5 Reasons Men Become Sugar Daddies

As a creative, I've had to take on numerous low-paying jobs at once to make ends meet, and I've many a times borrowed money from family members to stay afloat. So the idea of having a magical rich boyfriend who'd solve all my financial problems is definitely something that appeals to me, but I have to wonder... why do wealthy men such as CEOS, lawyers, and doctors choose to become sugar daddies, benefactors to usually younger partners? What's in it for them? 

For over a year, I researched the sugar lifestyle for my recent book, The Sugar Baby Club, which is about two college freshmen who become sugar babies in order to fund a trip to Paris. As they get more engrossed in the lifestyle, they begin to teach other girls in their dorm how to snag rich men.

To learn more about the subject, I interviewed various sugar daddies and female sugar babies, and I learned that sugar dating is similar to regular dating but with two major exceptions. One, the relationship is usually no strings attached and this is discussed up front, and two, there is lots and lots of spoiling with gifts. 

So while it’s easy to figure out why sugar babies sign up to receive, why are there men out there so eager to give? The following are some of the most popular reasons told to me by straight sugar daddies:

1. They aren’t getting sex from their wives.
There are some single sugar daddies who like spoiling women and having the ease of a non-serious relationship. But the majority of men seeking a sugar baby tend to be married or in relationships. 

For married guys in sexless partnerships, having a sugar baby is less messy than having an affair, where mistresses might beg for divorces or threaten to tell their lover’s wives. For married men, finding a companion who wants a monthly allowance but understands the relationship’s limitations is a better choice than dealing with a costly divorce.

2. They don’t believe in monogamy.
Unlike the sexless men mentioned above, some married or coupled up men actually love their partners but still can’t help the urge to stray. Blame it on biology or a sense of entitlement, but either way, these dudes are looking and want to be discrete.

Getting a sugar baby is easier than having a girlfriend because the sugar baby has managed expectations in exchange for their funding. A lawyer with a side-piece girlfriend would end up spending a lot of money on her anyway, but he risks her blabbing to his wife or serious partner. 

3. They’re looking to spice up their sex lives.
Sugar dating websites aren’t just for singles. There are couples signed up as sugar daddy and sugar mama duos, and they’re looking to add a third to spice up their relationship. To those couples wanting to get their freak on, it’s more time efficient (and reputation-saving) to snag a sugar baby than to approach girls in their regular lives.

4. They don’t want the expectations of a relationship.
For committed men looking for some side fun, becoming a sugar daddy makes sense. But why would a single, wealthy man want to pay a young lady to hang out with him? Isn’t it just easier to meet a lady off of Bumble? Well, for one, throwing money around to get a date to not act clingy or demand a ring one day is worth the cost of a monthly allowance to some. 

According to Seeking Arrangement, a sugar baby is given on average $3,000 a month, and in bigger markets like New York, girls can command up to $4,000.

5. The money means nothing to them.
A first-year associate at a BigLaw firm can make $190,000 a year, and partners can make anywhere from $399,000 annually to up to almost $800,000 a year on average. CEOS of large corporations often have multi-million dollar yearly contracts, and doctors rake in six-figure incomes. 

There are numerous other jobs that pay these kinds of salaries, and for someone making that much dough, helping out a college student, recent graduate, or someone making a more modest income doesn’t seem like that big of a deal. In fact, the men I interviewed said that they felt good about helping women who needed it, and it actually made them feel even more high-status being a benefactor.