It takes hundreds of hours to make a new best friend


When we're kids, it seems so easy to make a friend. You hang out before school, at school, and after school; and in less than a few weeks, you and your bestie are exchanging friendship bracelets and texting each other for hours.

But things seem to change once you enter the real world. Whether you enter right after high school or college, anyone who has had to get a job and live out on their own has probably encountered that their social life isn't the same as what it was when they were younger. And it turns out, it's because friendships cannot exist unless you put in the time. And if you're spending 40+ hours a week grinding, you're probably not spending hours building close relationships.

A new study from the University of Kansas found that it takes 50 hours of quality time to turn a casual acquaintance into a casual friend. It takes 90 hours to go from casual friend to actual friend. And if you want a drive-you-to-the-airport-kinda bestie then that requires 200 hours of work. The study also said that the time together needs to be fun--like hanging out, joking around, really connecting. Just being in an office together working isn't enough.

“We have to put that time in,” Associate Professor of Communication Studies at KU Jeffrey Hall said. “You can’t snap your fingers and make a friend. Maintaining close relationships is the most important work we do in our lives — most people on their deathbeds agree.”

Hall surveyed 355 adults who had moved in the past six months and were looking for new friends. He asked them to think of someone they had just met and how the relationship had progressed. He then analyzed how much time the respondents spent with their new friends and the level of closeness the parties had. 

Hall then surveyed 112 KU freshmen who were also new in town and were seeking friends. He combined the two surveys' data to determine the number of hours needed to reach each level of friendship, but another thing he noticed was that when young people fell for each other, they fell. Hard.

“When people transition between stages, they’ll double or triple the amount of time they spend with that other person in three weeks’ time,” Hall said. “I found freshmen who spent one-third of all waking hours in a month with one good friend.”

Hall noted that for people who want to make friends, it's a two-way street. Each party has to want to be each other's friends for this hourly process to work. 

“You can’t make people spend time with you, but you can invite them,” Hall said. “Make it a priority to spend time with potential friends. If you are interested in a friendship, switch up the context. If you work together, go to lunch or out for a drink. These things signal to people that you are interested in being friends with them.”

If you're interested in figuring out how close you are with your friends, try out this handy-dandy friendship evaluator! 

Anthony Hopkins Said Religion Helped Him Fight His Alcoholism

This year, we have heard numerous stories of people being taken down for terrible words or actions that they committed in the past. Activists scour Twitter timelines looking for offensive tweets, or scorned former lovers come forward with obscene stories about abuse. In some cases, one's history provides clear examples of a pattern of behavior that the offender has no remorse for, but in other instances, the bad behavior stemmed from immaturity or an inner battle with one's own demons. 

For the former, having their pasts drudged up and met with mob pitchforks can be satisfying for the victims and a much-needed punishment to the offenders. But for the latter who've tried to atone for their sins, what is the point of revisiting these dark places? 

In the case of Anthony Hopkins, talking openly about his years of alcohol addiction can inspire others to overcome their own problems and remind us all that in this age of internet outrage the concept of forgiveness should not be forgotten. 

Last week, Hopkins, now 80, spoke in Los Angeles at the 11th annual conference for LEAP, which is a nonprofit dedicated to helping young people lead successful lives. Hopkins said that when he was younger, working in the theater, he constantly drank; and he said that when working he was nearly always hungover. 

As reported by The Hollywood Reporter, Hopkins told the conference that in 1975 he was at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, and he was in a very dark place. He said that at this meeting his life changed when a woman asked him why he didn't trust in God. He said that once that notion was stuck in his head, he lost the desire to drink. 

"I believe that we are capable of so much," Hopkins said to the students gathered at LEAP. "From my own life, I still cannot believe that my life is what it is because I should have died in Wales, drunk or something like that. We can talk ourselves into death or we can talk ourselves into the best life we've ever lived. None of it was a mistake. It was all a destiny."

Some people are unaware that Alcoholics Anonymous was actually founded based on Christian principles, although it is not a religious organization. But the general idea that one can find peace and conquer their addictions by letting go of control and submitting oneself to a higher power has helped thousands of people in AA. Wanting to live a happier life is one of the most important steps to achieving it, but having faith is the extra component needed to unlock this life puzzle.

I really commend Hopkins for sharing his faith publicly. There was a joke in the recent season of Silicone Valley that said it was easier to live an alternative sexual lifestyle in the tech industry than it was to be a Christian; and in Hollywood, it's no different. 

But my hope is that those in Los Angeles and beyond will one day embrace religion like Hopkins did and that they will ignore the hatred spewed by certain "religious groups" that completely miss the mark regarding the teachings of Christ. 

What Is the Future of Roe Vs. Wade?

On June 27, Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy made the surprise announcement that he was resigning from his lifetime position. The moderate will step down at the end of July, which had many people wondering who President Donald Trump would name as his replacement and what that replacement would do for women's rights.

Trump announced in July that he wanted conservative Brett Kavanaugh to take Kennedy’s spot. Kavanaugh has never spoken explicitly about what he would do to abortion law, but he had previously ruled on an abortion case regarding an illegal immigrant seeking to end her pregnancy while in detainment. In his dissent, Kavanaugh said that the government was not obligated to provide "abortion on demand" to the young woman because she was in custody. He appeared more concerned about granting illegal immigrants more rights than the issue of abortion itself, but legal pundits believe that his decision in this case could indicate how he feels about abortion in general. 
 
Before the announcement, Trump said on Fox News that he would like to appoint a justice who believes abortion should be up to the states to decide, not the federal government.

“Roe v. Wade is probably the one that people are talking about in terms of having an effect, but we’ll see what happens. But it could very well end up with states at some point,” Trump said.

Last year, Trump picked a conservative, Neil Gorsuch, to replace Justice Antonin Scalia, and already, Gorsuch’s vote has affected labor unions, gay rights, and big business. With Kennedy’s resignation, experts believe that abortion rights will be the next big issue the Supreme Court will tackle.

Vox
spoke to several legal experts about what could happen to Roe Vs. Wade, and many agreed that the new justice’s appointment may affect abortion rights but will likely not abolish it nationwide.

“I expect that Justice Kennedy’s departure likely will impact the status of Roe and Casey, though I don’t expect the Court to overturn Roe immediately,” Gillian Metzger, a professor at Columbia Law School told Vox. “Instead, I expect we’ll see more incremental pullback, at least initially. But in practice it will become even more difficult, and in some states practically impossible, for women to exercise the right recognized in Roe and Casey of making the ultimate choice of whether or not to bear a child.”

Mary Ziegler, a professor at the Florida State University Law School, agreed that it is more likely we will see Roe vs. Wade chipped away instead of completely abolished.

“The most recent abortion case strengthened abortion rights, and there has been no groundwork laid for a decision reversing Roe tomorrow. Roberts and Alito have never written an opinion saying Roe should go,” Ziegler said to Vox. “So I think that it is more likely that we will see a more subtle or gradual attack on Roe — a series of cases chipping away at legal abortion. Or an effort to establish that almost no abortion regulations (or literally no abortion regulations) create an undue burden — the standard now used to measure the constitutionality of abortion restrictions.”

Robert Nagel, a professor at the University of Colorado Law School, said that based on precedent, the new Supreme Court Justice would most likely not overturn a previous controversial case at all, out of respect to the court itself.

“It is highly unlikely that replacing Justice Kennedy will result in an overruling of Roe. None of the highly controversial “landmark” decisions of the Warren Court — not Brown, not Miranda, not Baker v. Carr — have been overruled despite the fact that Republican appointees have had a numerical majority on the Court for almost all of the past four and a half decades,” Nagel said to Vox. “There are many reasons for this, but the main reason is that conservative jurists tend to equate the Court’s political standing — its prestige and legitimacy — with the rule of law itself.”

What LGBT Rights Could Change Under a Conservative Supreme Court?

President Donald Trump has named Brett Kavanaugh as his Supreme Court justice nominee to replace Anthony Kennedy.  Kavanaugh is a staunch conservative who has served as a judge in Washington DC, and earlier this month,  The Daily Beast said that the new judge could play a role in at least five major cases for the LGBT community that could affect their civil rights.
1. Pidgeon v. Turner
The Supreme Court legalized gay marriage in 2015, but the LGBTQ community worries that this right may be revoked with the appointment of a new conservative Supreme Court justice. And the case of Pidgeon v. Turner may not repeal the legality of gay marriage but could impact the legal rights of LGBTQ couples.
Two Texans, pastor Jack Pidgeon and accountant Larry Hicks, sued Houston Mayor Annise Parker in 2013, stating that taxpayers should not have to pay for the benefits of same-sex married couples who work for the government. They basically argued that same-sex couples did not deserve the same benefits as heterosexual couples, and the case is heading up to the Supreme Court.
2. Transgender military member cases
Several transgender military members sued President Trump after he announced his intention to ban transgender members from serving. Trump said that these servicemembers were too costly to allow because of their medical expenses. Federal courts have already blocked attempts to implement Trump’s discriminatory policy, but if he continues fighting for this cause, these cases could be decided by the Supreme Court.
“What makes the field even more challenging for LGBT advocates is the fact that, to date, no case directly involving transgender rights has made it to the Supreme Court,” The Daily Beast stated.
3. Arlene’s Flowers Inc. v. Washington
This year, the Supreme Court narrowly ruled in favor of a Colorado baker who refused to make a special cake for a same-sex wedding. The baker was ruled discriminatory by low-level courts, but the Supreme Court stated that Colorado had not respected the baker’s religious beliefs.
The Supreme Court will soon hear a similar case, this time concerning a florist who also refused to service a same-sex wedding. In late June, the court sent the Arlene’s Flowers case back to a state court in light of the Colorado baker case, but if the florist case returns, it could open the door for more businesses to deny goods and services to people seeking gay marriage.
4. EEOC v. R.G. & G.R. Harris Funeral Homes
“Sexual orientation” has not been added to Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and this has opened a debate as to whether or not LGBT people are safe from workplace discrimination. Many courts have interpreted the language in the act as protecting LGBT people from gender stereotyping, but the Supreme Court could challenge this with the case EEOC v. R.G. & G.R. Harris Funeral Homes.
Aimee Stephens, a transgender woman, was fired from her job at Harris Funeral Homes in Michigan after she came out. She sued her old employer, and the case may be seen soon by the Supreme Court.
5. Doe v. Boyertown Area School District
After gay marriage was legalized in 2015, Republican lawmakers became focused on stopping transgender people from using the bathroom of their choice. The Supreme Court has yet to rule on the matter, but if the case of Doe vs. Boyertown Area School District makes it’s way there, it could affect who uses what bathroom or locker room.
Last year in Boyertown Area School District in Pennsylvania, a cisgender student sued the school district over its transgender-inclusive restroom policy. They stated that it was a privacy violation to see a transgender student in the locker room with them.

1-in-8 Millennials Are Still Virgins at 26


TV shows like to present teenagers as sex-crazed lunatics, but a new study shows that millennials are actually more into waiting than doing. Researchers at the University of College London said that one in six millennials are still virgins by the age of 26. These young adults avoid having sex out of a "fear of intimacy."

The University College London tracked 16,000 people born in 1989 and 1990 since they were teenagers, according to The Telegraph. The project called Next Steps found that 1-in-8 of them were still virgins at the age of 26, showing that millennials are waiting longer to have sex than the generations before them. 

The study also found that as these millennials aged they were less likely to seek out sex partners. One sexpert said that this group has been over-exposed to sex and turned off by it. 

"Millennials have been brought up in a culture of hypersexuality, which has bred a fear of intimacy,” Susanna Abse of the Balint Consultancy said. "The women are always up for it, with beautiful, hard bodies, and the men have permanent erections. That is daunting to young people. The fear for young men is of being humiliated that they can't live up to that, plus the fear of exposure in your Facebook group."

Eating Shrimp Leads To More Sex


When I was growing up, my cheap-o immigrant parents would always tell me to eat as much shrimp as possible when we went to buffets because shrimp is expensive. 

As an adult, I often find myself leaning towards ordering seafood at restaurants because it was grilled into my diet by my parents... but good news for my dates. A new study says that eating seafood leads to more sex. But possible bad news for those dates, it also leads to increased fertility.

Researchers from Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health said that seafood boosts men and women's sex drives and improves the quality of their sperm and eggs. The study was published in the Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism.

The study said that people who eat at least two portions of seafood a week have more sex and get pregnant faster. Couples are also more likely to have sex on days they eat seafood. So that old wive's tale that oysters are aphrodisiacs is actually true!

“[The study] suggests both partners should be incorporating more seafood into their diets for the maximum fertility benefit," study leader Dr. Audrey Gaskins said.

Health officials recommend people eat 2-3 portions of seafood a week, but the majority of people only eat 1/3 of a portion a week.

So if you're looking for sex and a baby, go out and get that sushi, folks.

United States is one of the most dangerous countries for women

My sister Rebecca and my bestie also named Rebecca recommended I watch The Handmaid's Tale. I had tried to watch the show when it first came out, but I wasn't into it because I found it really bleak and violent.

Well, now that the news is a daily record of how minority and women's rights seem to be eroding, I've become obsessed with the show, wondering how soon we're going to enter a world where men control women's bodies and autonomy.

And if anyone says I'm paranoid, a new study from Thomson Reuters that tracks women's issues said that the United States was the tenth worst country for women. India was named the first because of the rampant rape and sexual slavery there, and anyone who follows what's going on in that country has probably heard about the numerous public sexual assaults that rarely get prosecuted.

The other countries on Thomson Reuters' list had extreme examples of violence and mistreatment of women, but the US made the list because of the formerly unchecked sexual harassment and misconduct that the #MeToo and #TimesUp movement exposed. In the US, sexual misconduct towards women was more underhanded than say a brutal gangrape on a bus in Delhi, but the system still allowed men like Brock Turner to commit violence with nothing more than a slap on the wrist. 

"People want to think income means you're protected from misogyny, and sadly that's not the case," said Cindy Southworth, executive vice president of the Washington-based National Network to End Domestic Violence. "We are going to look back and see this as a very powerful tipping point ... We're blowing the lid off and saying '#Metoo and Time's Up'."

The takedown of powerful men happened after Harvey Weinstein was outed in October 2017 by the New York Times as an alleged serial abuser, but even before Harvey, we as a nation were seeing what happened when we were complicit by looking the other way when gross behavior was on display. Being complicit led to Harvey Weinstein, and Bill Cosby, and Bill Clinton, and Donald Trump. And numerous other men that felt they were entitled to women's bodies just because women existed. While some argue that exchanging sexual favors with a powerful man is a consensual act and not a crime, many of the men who have been reported have a pattern with women that increasingly grows violent in nature.

The United States is a great place to live, but there is still misogyny that can create a hostile environment for women, at work, at home, and in public. Women who walk down the street do not consent to getting catcalled. Women who show up to work aren't consenting to being hit on by their boss. Women who go to school aren't consenting to shoulder rubs from their creepy professor. But until we all start having talks about consent women are going to have to keep fighting back.

And we're going to fight like hell before we inch any closer to The Handmaid's Tale. Which the two Rebeccas in my life were right about. It's a damn good show.

MOST DANGEROUS COUNTRIES TO BE A WOMAN by Thomson Reuters:
  1. India
  2. Afghanistan
  3. Syria
  4. Somalia
  5. Saudi Arabia
  6. Pakistan
  7. Congo
  8. Yemen
  9. Nigeria
  10. United States 

50 Percent of People Would Choose a Bigger Closet Over Sex

I have a huge girl crush on Carrie Bradshaw. Even though she's a fictional character, I love her lifestyle and of course, her cool clothes. In my real life, I have a tiny closet and a capsule wardrobe, but that doesn't stop me from fantasizing about a room full of shoes, purses, and colorful duds.

And apparently, there are plenty of other people who love clothes too. So much so that they'd take a bigger closet over sex. StyleCaster reported that a new study from MakeSpace said that 50% of the people polled said they would give up sex for six months in order to get more space. Weirdly, a lot of people were willing to give up sex, but only 20% were willing to give up money.

MakeSpace surveyed over 1,000 men and women nationwide for their results. While the study seemed surprising to me at first, people also chose the internet and food over sex in other polls.

So quite frankly, Americans aren't as horny as we're taught to believe. Maybe sex sells because in real life, all we want is more space and less contact.

Wearing a Breathing Mask to Bed Leads to Better Sex for Sleep Apnea Sufferers

Almost 200,000 adults have sleep apnea, a condition where your airways get blocked during sleep.  And a new study says that those who wear a breathing mask at night report having better sex lives, a new study shows. 

Sleep apnea has been linked to sexual dysfunction for men and women, but a study from Dr. Sebastian Jara of the University of Washington School of Medicine in Seattle said that people with the disorder who use a machine that provides continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP) report better sex lives than people who don't go with any treatment.

According to the Deccan Chronicle, sleep apnea can cause erectile dysfunction in men and vaginal dryness and painful intercourse for women. The small study found that the mask helped women the most with their sex lives, and while men's sex lives weren't changed by the device, men's health improved overall.

“At this point, it’s not clear why we saw such a large improvement in sexual quality of life in women but no improvement in men, especially given that other studies have shown improvement in men,” Dr. Jara told the Deccan Chronicle. “Despite this finding, CPAP has been shown to have numerous other health benefits in men and should still be encouraged."

Medical experts believe apnea is primarily caused by obseity and can sometimes be cleared up with weight loss. Without treatment, people with sleep apnea can experience tiredness, heart problems, and a decreased quality of life. 

Do more people do it on airplanes or in airports?


Whenever Americans have to embark on flying the unfriendly skies, what do they think about? 

Do they imagine getting their asses kicked like Dr. David Dao and then cashing out some massive legal settlement? 

Or maybe they think about that guy who got stung by a scorpion on his United Airlines flight. 

Or maybe they think about the wig-snatching airport brawl at the Spirit Airlines terminal in Florida. 

Or maybe they don’t think about any of the terrible crap that has happened in the news, and instead, they think about where they can find a place to have some raunchy sex before their redeye flight from New York to Chicago...

At least that's one theory according to a report from Jetcost. 

Jetcost said that one in 10 passengers claim to have landed their Boeing onto their lover’s airstrip while at the airport. This is surprising because most of us imagine joining the mile-high club, but in reality, more people do it at the airport. 

Jetcost surveyed 5,000 adult flyers, and based on their answers, the website found that ten percent of travelers have had sex in an airport while only 8 percent have done it on the flight. The logic here is that it is near impossible to bone on the airplane unless you’re flying private (and in that case of course you’re doing whatever the hell you want), but the percentages still seem kinda high. But this bias could be due to the fact that I’m lame and whenever I travel, I just eat a Cinnabon and then sit in my terminal, glued to checking Instagram my phone. How could I have missed all the sex around me?!

It’s either because the Jetcost surveyees are liars OR everyone is just doing a really good job of freaking on the low. According to Jetcost, 42% of people were playing hide the airplane in the restrooms, 28% were screwing in storage cupboards, and amazingly 14% were having sex “under a coat” like they were on ecstasy at Coachella. Weirdly, the private airline lounges came in fourth place on the list—maybe signaling that wealthy frequent fliers have more class than those fun freakers at an airport.

Amongst the thirsty travelers, 87% played captain-stewardess with their friend, but interestingly enough, 5% said that they hooked up with a stranger. Which begs the question. How? Did they meet at the airport bar and then got busy in the women’s restroom? What kind of pick up line did they use? How drunk do people actually get at an airport bar? Or did these strangers hook up sober? 

This could be a study in itself, so hopefully, Jetcost will fly away with this idea...

Does Sex Affect Sports Performance?


Since ancient times, male athletes have believed that porking a lady before a game would nuke their performance. However, a study published in Frontiers of Physiology debunked that idea, allowing the sexy superheroes we call athletes to spread their super sperm everywhere, anytime!

Researchers from the study said there “is no robust scientific evidence to indicate that sexual activity has a negative effect upon athletic results.” In other words, it’s okay to play hide the baton before a big game.

The researchers stated that the origin of no-sex-before-sports probably came from the ancient Roman and Greek societies who believed that winning was the result of great sacrifice. And we all know agreeing to not do the devil’s dance is a great sacrifice indeed! Modern day coaches also supported the sacrifice theory, mistakenly believing that sexual frustration leads to more aggression, which leads to better sporting. Coaches also believed that ejaculating meant losing testosterone, which they thought caused reduced aggression and muscle strength.

That meant athletes not only couldn’t have sex, but they also couldn’t masturbate. No wonder jocks in school tended to be the bullies; they were sexually frustrated for no reason at all.

Besides getting bad coaching advice, athletes in general are highly superstitious creatures. For instance, Serena Williams doesn’t change her socks, Michael Jordan wore his UNC shorts underneath his Bulls uniform, and Wade Boggs notoriously ate chicken before every game. If anyone was to blindly believe something in order to win, then it was going to be that group.

Researcher Laura Stefani told Gizmodo that the sex-affects-performance rumor was substantiated only through anecdotes, i.e. those coaches and their crazy theories. There was never any scientific proof that sex would suddenly slow you down or lose your focus. She said that maybe sex two hours before a game is a bad idea, but other than that, sex could actually help athletes win trophies, medals, and the adoration of us slobs drinking beer and watching from the sidelines.

To come up with this groundbreaking conclusion, Stefani and other researchers pored through hundreds of sports surveys until they determined the nine most reliable studies. They said that most of the sexual activity data focused on men, and that they weren’t sure if the new findings applied for women, who may not have believed the no sex myth in the first place anyway.

More Americans Are Having Gay Sex


Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” And for gay people living in a society where their sexuality isn’t always accepted, being true to themselves can be a struggle, which is why its commendable when they live their truths. Luckily, one new study says that more Americans than before are supporting the LGBT community. There were still some lame ass haters in the surveyed bunch, but in general, it seems like things are slowly getting better with time.

The 2016 massacre at a gay Orlando nightclub was a sad reminder to Americans that we have a ways to go to fight homophobia. The already horrendous hate crime got even more depressing when details of the shooter’s secret gay life started to surface—The shooter Omar Mateen, a married man with a kid, apparently had been to the nightclub numerous times and he had a profile on a gay dating app. Here was a guy who hated himself so much that he went out and shot up his own people instead of coming out of the closet. He was a man who couldn’t accept himself, even though the amount of men who had reported having same-sex sex has doubled from what was reported in the 1990s.

In a study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, researchers found the amount of same-sex encounters and acceptance of gays has risen over the past 25 years. After polling 30,000 adults about their sexual behaviors (not orientation), researchers found that same-sex encounters with men has almost doubled, from 4.5 percent to 8.2 percent. Lesbian sex almost tripled, from 3.6 percent to 8.7 percent. And these findings are all just based on what people reported. It could actually be more in real life.

Professors Jean Twenge, Ryne Sherman, and Brooke Wells added that acceptance of homosexuality has increased from 49 percent to 63 percent from 1990 to 2014. Twenge said that in the past 25 years there has been a huge “cultural change” and that “without the strict social rules common in the past, Americans now feel more free to have sexual experiences they desire.” Overall, it seemed like the researchers were optimistic with the growing numbers, despite continued hate crimes, dumb bathroom laws, the GOP, the Westboro Church, and Donald Trump supporters. Those anti-gay idiots may have their hearts filled with intolerance and hate, but new generations are proving that we are slowly moving towards an open sexual society. That period of time may take decades, but there is something special about knowing that people are moving forward and not backwards when it comes to acceptance and love.

"[The study] suggests that our sexuality has become much more free and open, that Americans feel much more freedom to express themselves sexually in a way that they see fit," Twenge said. "That's why it comes down to this individualistic viewpoint: do what's right for you."

Virgins more likely to not get divorced, but good luck finding one


For a long ass time, religious men have been telling women to remain virgins until marriage, and a lot of women have responded by gleefully getting laid before the big day. Now trying to find a virgin to wed is more elusive than finding rare Pokemon, but apparently those virgins are worth catching. At least that's according to a study helmed by people whose goal is to keep traditional families alive. 

A study from The Institute for Family Studies said that women who were virgins when they married are less likely to divorce. It stated that virgin brides were least likely to divorce after five years than women who had played hide the salami with two or more men before marriage. The study also said that women who had premarital sex, whether with two men or ten, were likely to get the ax no matter what their magic number was. The study was conducted by Professor Nicholas H. Wolfinger from the University of Utah, and he analyzed three sets of data from the CDC’s National Survey of Family Growth.

The Christian Post asked why there was no difference between women who had premarital sex with two men versus ten, and Wolfinger said he couldn’t give a scientific explanation. But he believed having sex with multiple people gave women experience that there were sexual alternatives out there. Apparently that knowledge was equivalent to Eve biting the apple.

This study brought a slew of right-wingers to urge women to save themselves before marriage, but The Daily Beast pointed out how stupid that was. After all, only 5% of women keep their flower intact before marriage, so that leaves a hell of a lot more women who can’t do anything with the study’s results, even if they wanted to.

The study said that society’s progressive attitudes towards premarital sex were partly to blame for the scarcity of virgins. Wolfinger said to The Christian Post, “Earlier research found that having multiple sex partners prior to marriage could lead to less happy marriages, and often increased the odds of divorce. But sexual attitudes and behaviors continue to change in America, and some of the strongest predictors of divorce in years gone by no longer matter as much as they once did.”

To Wolfinger, Americans have become more accepting of sex outside of marriage, and in this modern hook up culture, men don’t expect women to be virgins anymore. But for those unicorns, women with little to no sexual experience, Wolfinger said they chose to not hook up without a ring because religion plays a huge factor in their lives. 

“These findings make sense in light of the fact that people who attend church frequently have lower divorce rates than do non-participants," Wolfinger said. 

Study Says Women Put In More Work in Relations Than Men, Happier When Single


One of the biggest things that annoyed me growing up was that my parents told me I needed to act a certain way to attract and keep a husband. Even at a young age, I knew that many parents did not teach their sons to strive to get wives, and even those parents who pushed their male children to get married did not usually force them to fit into a narrow box, the way that women are taught to be dutiful wives.

It is widely accepted that men only settle down after they've achieved their dreams but women often give up themselves in order to find a man and start a family. While I've always thought that this was unfair, I also accepted this as a truth in life. Well, it turns out that a study has proven that yes women really do invest more in relationships, and here's the kicker.... the majority of women are happier when single.

Now I enjoy being single, but I also enjoy being in loving relationships. But that's the thing. A loving relationship is awesome, but some people are in relationships just to be in relationships, and according to a study from Mintel, it's the women who put in the majority of the work in these crap bag situations.

Mintel said that 61% of women are happy being single, and that 75% of single women were not actively looking for a relationship last year. The reason? Relationships are a lot of work, and women put in more effort and labor than men.

“There’s evidence that women spend longer on domestic tasks than men and I think they also do more emotional work - so they still do more housework and cooking and things as well as more emotional labor,” Professor Emily Grundy, of the University of Essex, told The Telegraph.

Women also spend a lot of effort and time on upkeep like grooming and shopping to maintain her man's interest, and while some women genuinely enjoy that, it's a fucking drag when the purpose of upkeep is to stop your man from whining or getting a wandering eye.

Grundy explained that women are also happier than men at being single because women maintain friendships where they get emotional support, while men use their female partners as their sounding board.

“Women tend to be better at having alternative social networks and other confidantes whereas men tend to rely quite heavily on their wives for that and have fewer other social ties,” Dr. Grundy said. “Certainly there’s a common finding from a lot of studies that women who don’t have a partner tend to do more social activities and more friends compared to women with partners whereas with men it’s the reverse - men without a partner tend to do much less of that. So it may be that women have a wider range of alternatives.”

So what can we learn from this study? After all, as an advocate for coupling up, I want people to find true love. BUT I want people to enter satisfying relationships, and if women are doing the bulk of the work with no appreciation, then that isn't going to fly and that needs to change. So for all the men out there that want to attract a quality woman, consider an equal partnership or do the BDSM-way and discuss your roles before you enter a relationship. 

Pillowtalk is real


Remember in 2012, when David Patraeus resigned as Director of the CIA? The married four-star general was doing it with his biographer, Paula Broadwell, and after a crazy government investigation, it was discovered that Mr. Central Intelligence was not only feeding his mistress his dick but also top secret info. Which begs the question—how good was the sex that he’d sell out his country? Well, a new study found that any sex can get people to overshare information. So spies and shady people BEWARE!

Recently, a study with a title so clever you’d think it was published in Hustler was released in the journal, Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. The study’s name—“Sex Unleashes Your Tongue.”

The pillowtalk study said that sex gets people to reveal their secrets, no matter how dark or classified, and that pillowtalk will happen whether or not you know your lover well or even like them.

(Which kinda goes back to my post that you shouldn't engage in casual sex...) 

“Sex Unleashes Your Tongue” was a collection of three sex studies that examined why sexual stimuli versus non-sexual stimuli opened up strangers to have revealing conversations. The studies all involved single, straight male and female college students in their 20s and was performed by the same group of Israeli researchers.

The first study divided 39 men and 39 women into two groups, “sexual priming” and “neutral priming.” The sexual primed people were shown erotic (but sadly not pornographic) pictures, and the neutral primed group were literally shown pictures of fish. Then the undergrads were told to start instant messaging strangers of the opposite sex. The study found that the sexually primed group turned out to be the biggest blabbermouths compared to the fish-watchers.

The second study took 41 women and 41 men and divided them the same way as before. The researchers showed the sexual primed group a steamy part from Original Sin, the super boring period piece starring Antonio Banderas and Angelina Jolie, which was only redeemed by one really good scene of the two of them boning in a bed. The neutral group was shown what nearly everyone watches on the internet that’s not porn—cat videos. Super fucking amazing cat videos. Then they met with a stranger and were told to reveal a personal embarrassing event. Just like before, the people who saw the erotic images were prone to spill more details.

The third study had students watch either a video of a couple kissing or a video of a couple hanging out in an intimate way without touching. For this study, the researchers wanted to know if there was a difference between sexual priming and intimacy priming, and like before, participants spilled the beans when they watched erotic actions. So note to self, just hanging out with people is not enough to get them to reveal any secrets.

So what’s the big lesson to all of this? David Patreaus and anyone in his position should never, ever, ever have sex or watch Original Sin. For everyone else, prepare to learn more about your lover than you probably care to know.

Couples Who Share Chores Have Better Sex


If anyone were to view relationships through the eyes of an old-school TV comedy, they would think that men are schlubs with hot wives, and those hot wives delightfully nag but do most of the household chores. While this dynamic may have worked for couples in the past, a study said that more progressive pairs report having better sex lives than their traditional counterparts. More specifically--those who share chores have more sex. So start vacuuming, fellas! That’s the secret to gettin’ some.

The Journal of Marriage and Family published a study that said couples that shared chores were having more sex than traditional couples who divvied up their duties by gender. The researchers went a step further and said they were also the only couples who were having more sex than the generations before them. This is important because studies have found that younger generations globally are fucking like pandas instead of rabbits. The cause for Gen Xers and their younger siblings having less sex are still being explored—but a lot of people are blaming Netflix and cell phone use. Apparently, people really do just Netflix and chill, and not Netflix and chill.

Researchers at Cornell University said that in two decades our attitude towards chores and sex have changed.

“By 2006, couples who reported sharing housework fairly equally, with the man doing more than a third and up to 65% of the housework, reported having sex significantly more often than did couples where the woman (or the man) did 65% or more of the housework,” the study's lead author Sharon Sassler told Time.

Gone are the Mad Men days when men could be assholes who just came home and expected food on the table. They’re now expected to cook and clean, and most importantly, the study said, to help with childcare. 

Historian Stephanie Coontz told Time that in the 1950s and 1960s, wives were expected to do chores and put out, and although traditional couples had a lot of sex, Coontz said that the sex wasn’t any good. But that’s all changed thanks to sweeping and changing diapers. 

So good job, helpful men and the ladies who love them. I just want to put it out there, that I too love a man who knows how to do laundry! 

Oohhh - la - la !

Sex Helps Women with Memory Problems


If you're a woman and you've misplaced your keys or forgot the name of your friend's husband, don't fret. A Canadian researcher thinks you can help your bad memory by having lots and lots of sex. 

For realz. 

Researchers at McGill University in Canada studied the effects of penis-vagina intercourse (PVI) on women, which sounds like a pretty cool job even though they nerded sex up by calling it PVI. But anyway, McGill’s team polled 78 heterosexual women under the age of 30 by giving them memory tests involving faces and abstract words. Then the women were given a questionnaire that asked about their sex lives, grade point average, and whether or not they use birth control. 

From there, McGilligans (a term I just made up) concluded that boffing helped women remember abstract words because there was a link between sex and the growth of tissue in the hippocampus, which is an area in your brain that controls memories, emotions, and your nervous system. 

McGill professor Jens Pruessner said that his research was in the beginning stages and that there were no firm conclusions just yet, but he said there was still a link between memory and sex.

“The chemicals involved with signaling reward to the brain—hormones and neurotransmitters—have been shown to be associated with both memory and sexual activity,” Pruessner told Broadly. 

To No One’s Shock, Men Admit to Loving Doggy Style


Most of us are excited to get action, but for men, they are even happier when they get…wait for it. Wait for it… Doggy style! (Yeah, I know. No one is surprised.) While anecdotally we can all just assume men love to tap that ass from behind, a 2016 study from Dr. Ed has confirmed what we all already knew. 

Dr. Ed surveyed 2,000 people in the United States and throughout Europe to find out what people like in bed. Then the company compared those answers country by country to see if culture shaped preferences. While there were some differences reported, one thing was for certain-- All men loved doggy style and missionary sex. Like vanilla as an ice cream flavor, those two positions will never go out of style.

After doggy style, reverse cowgirl was ranked second as men's fave position, and missionary thrust its way into first in the United States. Fortunately for kitchen tables everywhere, men said that they hated to boink their ladies in the tabletop position, where the guy is standing and the woman is sitting on a table with her legs up.

While it may be difficult to get a man to try that new Ethiopian restaurant down the street or talk about his feelings, the study found that men are adventurous when it came to sex. They reported that they were open to trying out new positions, and surprise, surprise, they really wanted to try anal, which was the second most requested new position.

Sex Ed Sucks Now, Study Shows


Millennial and people older than millennials can probably recall their sex ed classes in grade school and beyond. There was always a video about their changing body. There was talk about urges and fighting those urges because teachers could never outwardly be cool about their students boning. But the point is, at least for all of us, we had some kind of sex ed. No matter how much we immaturely giggled through it or no matter how lame it was, it existed.

But a recent study said a lot of teens aren’t getting the birds and bees talk at home or at school, and that’s resulting in an explosion of STDs and teen pregnancies. Planned Parenthood said there’s 20 million cases of STDs a year. And those cases range from the everybody-has-it HPV to the super scary bubbly herpes. Planned Parenthood also told Teen Vogue in 2016 that America has the highest rate of unintended teen pregnancy in the industrialized world, and they said a recent study by the Guttmacher Institute has proven that teens were getting more sex education over ten years ago than now. That means teens were learning more about their bodies when abstinence-only advocate George W. Bush was in office. (I guess, this explains how they can get so many applicants on MTV’s Teen Mom.)

The study from the Guttmacher Institute analyzed data from a survey from 2006 to 2010 and a survey from 2011 to 2013. Guttmacher’s researchers say the amount of teens saying they learned about sex from school dropped from survey one to two.   

The Guttmacher Institute said that sex education is only mandated in 24 states and the District of Columbia, and that there’s no consistency from state to state. Some schools talk about LGBT identities, but others don’t. Some give medically accurate information, and some reportedly don’t. (If they’re not medically accurate, then what are they teaching?) 

But even if sex education is present, one of the major problems the study found was that not enough people were talking about birth control. In the survey, 21% of girls and 35% of boys said no one at school or at home told them about it. Maybe it was because their teachers and parents were squeamish about sex, or maybe they were naïve that kids get horny. Or maybe they were all too fucking lazy to have the super awkward sex talk. But for whatever reason, we all know that squeamishness, naivety, and laziness leads to diseases and/or babies. Lots and lots of babies. And abortions if we’re getting dark and real here.

Years before the Guttmacher study, the Center for Disease Control did their own research. They found that almost half of sexually active high school students didn’t use a condom, and they found some correlation that many sex ed programs were bypassing teaching condom use in their curriculum. 


So what are teens supposed to do? If they aren’t getting good sex ed in school, they’re stuck surfing the internet or asking their idiot friends. Luckily, Planned Parenthood still exists (As long as the GOP doesn’t have its way), and they are still the number one provider of free sex education. Let’s just hope that PP sticks around and lets teens know to wrap up their junk or at least be there to give them a test or medication when they don’t.